< Upheaval: Overexposed, Take 2

Sunday, October 16, 2005

Overexposed, Take 2

Apparently, it is not enough to bare one's breasts in front of an autistic child, his mother, and a professor. No. That is not humbling enough. That does not make one blush enough.

Apparently, it is necessary to continue to have embarrassing breast-baring episodes until all dignity is lost, and "blush" becomes the permanant color of one's face.

Last night, Daniel and I were going on a date. Daniel took Dillon to my parents' house for hours of college football games and a photo session. I was getting ready at home, and the last thing I needed to do was use my bicycle horns so that we could have 3-4 hours of freedom.

I was getting ready to pump, and realized I had forgotten the bottles that attach to the bicycle horns. I went to the kitchen, wearing just my bra and pants. I was standing in front of the kitchen window, that faces into our carport, when I saw a movement outside. I glanced up, and who was in the carport but our 14-year-old neighbor boy. He waved sweetly, and then, saw the look of horror on my face. He then realized what he was looking at. Did I mention that the bra I wore was a nursing bra, and that the flaps were down???

GREEAAAAAT.

Neighbor-boy knocked on the door. I sprinted to the bathroom to get my robe, then sprinted back to answer his knock. I won't tell you what word I was saying during my mad dash through the house, but it does rhyme with "fit" or "mitt."

By the time I got to the door, neighbor-boy was bright red and his hands were shaking. He tried to pretend that nothing had happened, and continued on his mission of requesting Daniel's shoe polish kit. I dutifully got it for him and he explained that he was on his way to the Homecoming Dance.

An innocent freshman boy. On his way to one of his first big dates. I wonder if I have scarred him for life. I told Daniel that we have to sell the house and move. Or at least get some curtains.

13 Comments:

Blogger ~Jennifer said...

LOL! Poor guy. I'm the mother of a 14 year old boy, but he's so desensitized to the whole nursing thing he probably wouldn't have even noticed. I think he thinks it's normal for women to be air drying breasts and flopping them out whenever necessary.

12:03 PM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

That is hilariously horrific! Scar him? Noooooo. That's not the word I'd choose to describe how you affected a 14 yr old boy.

HA

8:44 PM  
Blogger Sharkey said...

Oh no! But it did make me laugh just a little bit. Hope you and Daniel had a good time on your date!

10:16 PM  
Blogger Amstaff Mom said...

Oh my goodness. I would just die.

DIE!!!!

8:06 AM  
Blogger Amanda Sue said...

AM - i came very close to death. many times over.

i relive the death each time i pass by the kitchen window, see the dreaded breast pump, see my neighbor's house, or put on my bra.

10:04 AM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

Glad to see you haven't lost your dramatic flair...

10:34 AM  
Blogger Trinity13 said...

Oh my!!! You poor thing! Doesn't your neighbor boy know to not come over when your bossoms are exposed?

10:47 AM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

Wonder if he'll be needing to borrow Daniel's shoe polish more often now...

11:43 AM  
Blogger Amanda said...

Oh good gravy! I'm so sorry! I too would be completely horrified. But, I agree with your sister. I doubt you scarred the kid. You probably made his day. ;)

1:50 PM  
Blogger Sydney said...

So Funny....

I love visiting your site Amanada. It makes me feel normal. Pumping is such a joy! But on the upside you did get to go on a date!!!! HURRAH!

Keep sharing I NEED your posts!
You are helping to keep me sane by knowing somebody else is going through the harrowing experiences motherhood and all it's joys as am I! Thanks for the laugh!

2:20 PM  
Blogger jes said...

oh, amanda. this made me laugh, OUT LOUD, in my cubicle. sucks for you, though. keep sharing these stories of your embarrassment! i'm getting a kick out of them! ;)

2:24 PM  
Blogger Ben said...

Bet he will never forget THAT date. lol

8:37 PM  
Blogger Katie said...

Oh Amanda Sue that is awful (funny). How embarrasing (funny) for you. Poor kid he was probably more embarrased (laughing) then you were (laughing much later).

Sad (funny)

8:50 AM  

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