Two thumbs down

Watching movies is one of my least favorite things to do. I have seen very few "classic" movies, and cannot converse about any movies because I promptly forget about the movie as soon as it is over.

So, as we were folding blankets and putting pillows away from our Movie Date Night last night, I told Daniel, "I have GOT to blog about that movie. It was terrible." During church this morning, I thought "I have GOT to blog about that movie!" and on the drive home I said, again, "I have GOT to blog about that movie!"

So here I am, ready to share with you my impressions of this movie that I suffered through for over two hours last night.

We started the movie and endured a few minutes of "flashback scenes" where this boy remembers creeping around in his grandpa's attic during a storm.

I said, "This is gonna be like Neverending Story."

Daniel said, "Shhhh."

A few minutes later in the film, the main character is driving some manly-looking snow machine in the Arctic Circle and using high-tech equipment to locate something under the ice.

I said, "This is gonna be like Indiana Jones, too!"

Daniel said, "Mmmm-hmmm."

After a few more minutes of this sequence, the main character had a lengthy speaking part.

I said, "Oohh! Daniel, pause it!"

Daniel did.

I said, "I really hate this guy. I don't know why he gets paid to make movies! He has got to be the worst actor."

Daniel said, "Yeah, I know."

Unpause.

There were some tense moments and then a lot of things blew up, but of course all of the main characters survived. Then they decided to try to steal something big and important, because that was the ONLY solution to their problem.

I said, "This is gonna be like Entrapment or Ocean's Eleven."

Daniel sighed, "Yep."

The movie is about halfway over. There are some parts that have tried to be funny, but aren't. I am very disturbed by the haphazard way these archaeologist-type people are treating historical artifacts. I hate the way the main actor talks in monotone. There is a random, and unnecessary, love-connection that happens along the way. This, in no way, enhances the story-line at all.

I interrupt the movie to tell Daniel all of these things.

He agrees, miserably.

There are about thirty minutes left of the movie. I have rolled my eyes so much that they ache. I ask Daniel to pause it so I can fix some ice cream. That makes the movie more enjoyable.

We finish the movie. It is very predictable. The main character does not get in trouble, even though he has violated many federal laws. The FBI sees that he did it for the good of his country. The main character gets the girl. The bad guy goes to prison or dies or something. I don't know because I was busy filing my nails.

I said, "Dang. That really sucked."

And my sweetheart had no choice but to agree. Funny that he doesn't make me watch movies with him very often...