< Upheaval: Baby's got her blue jeans on

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Baby's got her blue jeans on

I hate stretch denim. This is a stupid fabric to make jeans out of.

The sizes on these jeans should be in two parts. For instance: 8/14.

The first number is the size the jeans are when you pull them out of the dryer. For me, that is skin tight. You can read the day of the week on my underwear through these pants.

The second number is the size of the jeans after a few hours of wear. If you need to go to the bathroom, you can pull the jeans down without even unbuttoning or unzipping them. The butt part of the pants is sagging and the crotch has a big pouch when you sit down.

Who can wear these jeans and look good? (Don't tell me if it is you!)

The problem I have encountered is that almost all jeans have some "stretch" quality to them. What happened to the old-timey denim that stayed roughly the same size until the third day of wear? I miss the good ol' days.

Guess I will have to wear sweatpants again today. At least the waist is elastic.


Blogger koyama said...

"old-timey denim"
Is that an Amanda-ism?! Love it!
I am going to incorporate the expression "old-timey" into my vocabulary immediately. It is so bizarre that stretch denim can frustrate people from one end of North America to the other. I agree!!

10:46 AM  
Blogger Princess21 said...

Love this!!!

I actually love my stretch denim...but totally agree with the sizing!! It is ultra silly!!!

10:55 AM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

You still wear day of the week panties? COOL!

12:58 PM  
Blogger Amstaff Mom said...


You dry your jeans? I dry very few things, and I definitely wouldn't dry jeans. Don't they shrink to oblivion?

I don't think I have any stretchy jeans, but the same thing seems to happen w/ low-rise jeans on me. They fit fine for the first 2 hours and then I'm struggling to keep my shirt down to keep my jeans from gaping and showing waistline.

1:33 PM  
Blogger Amanda Sue said...

am - i dry my jeans! they have to fit!

and also, didn't you know that you are supposed to let your waistline show over low-rise jeans. it is also cool to pull your thong up to your armpits and let that hang out, too. lemme know how that works out for ya!

8:24 PM  
Blogger Amanda said...

I have the same problem with some dress pants. I have some dockers that looked great when I tried them on and when I wear them to work all day they look like Hammer pants. Remember those?

8:07 AM  
Blogger Amanda Sue said...

oooooh yeah! hammer pants!

8:47 AM  
Blogger Trinity13 said...

I love my stretchy denim...I can wear jeans two sizes smaller than what I actually am!!!

9:39 AM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

Stretchy pants are impossible to wear. Especially if you have a butt. Or if you once had a butt, then had a baby and no longer have a butt.

Hammer pants = comfort + style. Okay really it equals a wife beater t-shirt and a Gold's Gym membership.

3:36 PM  
Blogger Michelle said...

Jenn- Did you lose your butt after baby, too? My hubby said once that mine was gone, too! Now, though, he doesn't remember saying it though, because he doesn't know if it hurts my feelings or not! :)

5:04 PM  
Blogger YankeeAmanda said...

Well, when you're a BBW (big beautiful woman) like me, you love most things stretchy. I only have one pair of jeans that don't have some form of stretchy material. If I had a great figure I'm sure I wouldn't love it so much, but "old-timey" denim bunches in some places and pinches in others on this voluptuous body. No thankies.

9:38 PM  
Blogger Amstaff Mom said...

AS - nobody wants to see THIS waistline sticking out.

And jeans and thongs don't work for me. Don't ask why, they just don't.

2:36 PM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

Thongs disappear. I don't think that was the intent of the inventor, though if it was a man, perhaps it was..

3:10 PM  
Blogger Shenna said...

I totally agree! I feel like I'm always pulling my pants up! It's kind of deceiving, makes me think I'm losing weight or something! :)

4:11 PM  

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