< Upheaval: Maturity is in the eye of the beholder

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Maturity is in the eye of the beholder

Recently, I have become a student again. Once a week, for a couple of hours, I sit in a classroom, and learn how to be a parent. Or, that is what I thought we would learn about. Really, these classes are about everything from pregnancy, to labor, to birth and breastfeeding. I haven't learned any parenting skills yet.

What I have learned is that, no matter how old you are, watching videos of women in labor can bring you back to your seventh grade science class where you are watching "The Miracle of Birth" about a very hairy woman in the nineteen seventies. Many of the students, all first time parents, giggle behind their hands when they talk about "bowel movements" or show different laboring positions. Much like we all did in the seventh grade.

It is very validating to not feel like the most immature out of the bunch. I can handle a frank discussion about enemas. I can watch a woman grunt for long periods of time without exploding into laughter.

My husband, however, cannot. So when it comes time for you to take a parenting class, I will loan him to you. He makes everyone else seem like, at least, a senior in high school.


Blogger Jennboree said...

HAHA! I can totally picture Daniel witnessing such a video. I had to hush Heath many times during the parenting classes we went to. Everything was hilarious to him...or disgusting. The two packs of M&Ms he inhaled prior to class each week from the vending machine didn't help much.

Just wait till breastfeeding day.

Have ya'll discussed the loco lochea?

Good times.

6:29 PM  
Blogger Vanessa said...

I bet he was one of those junior high boys who cracked up when his teacher said "Homo sapien."

8:31 PM  
Blogger trane60 said...

I've never had a frank discussion about enemas. :-)Whoops, I shouldn't be smiling. I actually enjoyed the classes. They had good snacks too. :-)

8:48 PM  
Blogger Princess21 said...

I am sure you are going to be an awesome parent!!! Silly husband and all. :)

So when is this frank discussion on enemas??? :)

8:26 AM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

Hope no guy in the class is named Frank. Don't think he'd want to be part of the discussion on enemas.

8:57 AM  
Blogger Amanda Sue said...

we already had the enema discussion. whether or not to do one before going into labor, to save yourself from pooing on your doctor.

delicate, eh?

9:41 AM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

Nothing about childbirth is delicate.

But then, not much of what Daniel has seen as a cop has been too delicate either, eh? It should totally be no biggie.


11:22 AM  
Blogger cindy said...

Sounded like a good laugh, would have paid to see that.

11:36 AM  
Blogger jes said...

what a generous offer, amanda: loaning out daniel.

i, too, suffer from an adolescent sense of humor. i totally think that i would be giggling all the way through it.

11:51 AM  
Blogger Amstaff Mom said...

They have those comedy defensive driving courses(not that I've needed one) so why not comedy parenting classes? Why not have a little fun while you're learning?

3:03 PM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

Great idea, Amstaff! It would've helped us both to have a little humor to lighten the sheer terror we felt.

5:04 PM  
Blogger Amanda Sue said...

funny childbirth classes sound great! i would enjoy them. i am not sure that scary-giant-bible-man or mullet/chilibowl guy would really like them. they are both pretty serious, and seem like professional labor coaches.

not that i am judging - they are just REALLY into the details, nodding along with the videos and such.

5:35 PM  
Blogger Jennboree said...

I remember the men asked way more questions than the women in the classes we went to.

They tend to overthink the whole thing.

Imagine THAT.

10:06 AM  
Blogger Diane said...

My husband came in to prenatal classes smelling like chili and onions - we had to practice the slow-dance labor thing that night - I wanted to vomit. Then he laughed out loud at the breast-feeding class when the teacher said she had access to a place that sold EEE, H, and even I-sized nursing bras. He wanted to know if it was for the front of someone's car...the teacher was not amused...

11:15 AM  

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