Open my eyes
Why is it so hard to be the one person to befriend an outcast? Why is it so hard to overlook quirkiness and accept other people as God would want us to?
The classroom situation with Hands in Her Mouth has gotten way out of hand. (No pun intended!) The professor has even made remarks about her mannerisms, and our program director has pulled her aside to address the issue, citing poor hygiene and the spread of germs. The bottom line is that in the group of students in our grant program, she has not one friend. In fact, she is ridiculed constantly.
I am ashamed to say that I have participated. I have not stood silently by and watched as others made comments. No, I have been one of the ONES. The bullies. Me. I cut my eyes at my friend when I see her fingers in her mouth. I make faces when she handles papers and passes them to others in the room.
The saddest part is that I know better. God made her with the same care that He made me, or Daniel, or perfect little Dillon. God loves her just the same. And I should, too. I should be the one person who will smile at her, and ask her how her day is. I should be the one person who compliments her shoes. I should be the one.
Anyway, I guess you can tell my heart is convicted about this. Now I just need to act on it.
The classroom situation with Hands in Her Mouth has gotten way out of hand. (No pun intended!) The professor has even made remarks about her mannerisms, and our program director has pulled her aside to address the issue, citing poor hygiene and the spread of germs. The bottom line is that in the group of students in our grant program, she has not one friend. In fact, she is ridiculed constantly.
I am ashamed to say that I have participated. I have not stood silently by and watched as others made comments. No, I have been one of the ONES. The bullies. Me. I cut my eyes at my friend when I see her fingers in her mouth. I make faces when she handles papers and passes them to others in the room.
The saddest part is that I know better. God made her with the same care that He made me, or Daniel, or perfect little Dillon. God loves her just the same. And I should, too. I should be the one person who will smile at her, and ask her how her day is. I should be the one person who compliments her shoes. I should be the one.
Anyway, I guess you can tell my heart is convicted about this. Now I just need to act on it.
posted by Amanda
at
11:41 AM
10 Comments:
It is often easy to do as others do, whether intentional or not. Breaking away from that and acting on your own instead is often difficult.
I applaud you for recognizing the situation. Let us know what comes of your conviction to treat her differently :)
mcxie! welcome!
also, you don't have to correct your spelling. i love you anyway. :)
Maybe her behavior won't change until she has a friend. It could be some odd way of dealing with insecurity, and it will only get worse if she's mocked for it. Just a thought.
wow. i never read the original post in October. that's what i get for not having a subscription to your site. ;)
i'm wondering if you could love on them, and that would help stop the behaviors that drive you crazy. you could even find them endearing! awww, how sweet! popping toes and slimy fingers!
if that won't work, try getting hands a blanky. and if only feet would wear super-tight jeans, so she couldn't BEND her legs. encourage them in these ways.
oh, wait. that's not helping the dilemma and the conviction, is it?
amanda - hilariously enough, one of our classes together is behavior modification. ha!
today i did not make any comments or any inappropriate gestures, and i smiled at her when she made a joke. baby steps, guys. baby steps.
oooooooooooh, was it a courtesy smile? I can peg yours in an instant. Ha! I just pictured you courtesy smiling.
thanks, jenn.
i SAID baby steps!
i imagined a tight-lipped smile with her eyes looking sideways at the girl. and maybe her nose wrinkled a little, and her head was cocked to the side.
or, maybe that's what i would do.
Amanda's courtesy smile is pretty subtle. If you know her true smiles, only then can you peg the pretend ones.
Sorry, Amanda, but 'tis true.
*smile*
i like that philosophy uncle ! i am glad you came by my blog. i really never thought you would. :)
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